world_of_homestuckfandomcom-20200214-history
102413 Jossik Doir
06:44 -- garrisonedGuardian GG began trolling galactoidArrival GA at 18:44 -- 06:44 GG: Hello, human friend do-r! 06:45 GA: hi jossik 06:45 GA: hows it going? 06:45 GG: Pretty good, actually! 06:45 GG: Have you entered the game yet? 06:45 GA: yeah 06:45 GG: Awesome! 06:45 GG: What's your t-tle? 06:45 GA: page of mind 06:45 GA: have you entered? 06:46 GG: Yeah! 06:46 GG: -'m -n my land now. 06:46 GA: whatre you? 06:46 GG: -'m the Knight of Heart. 06:46 GA: cool 06:46 GG: - still dont know what that means yet. 06:46 GA: maybe you wear a punch of silly pink armor with hearts on it 06:47 GG: Maybe - f-ght with the power of love 06:47 GA: and - give other people minds like pages give swords 06:47 GG: Huh 06:47 GA: you get a brain! 06:47 GA: and you get a brain! 06:47 GG: - wonder how that would even work? 06:47 GA: everyone look unda yo seats, you got a brain today! 06:47 GG: Like would you increase peoples -ntell-gence? 06:48 GG: Or just the-r mental capacity? 06:48 GA: why would i even do that 06:48 GG: - don't know 06:48 GA: i think king arthur was a page once 06:48 GG: Maybe to help your friends 06:48 GG: you help them get smarter 06:48 GA: sounds dumb 06:48 GA: my friends arent stupid 06:48 GG: Everyone can afford to be smarter, though 06:49 GG: But that doesnt really matter 06:49 GA: yeah 06:49 GG: seeing as how we dont know for sure thats even what you do 06:49 GA: so you fight with the power of love? 06:49 GA: i know a guy like that 06:49 GG: Or maybe - fight for the cause of love? 06:49 GG: - dont know. 06:49 GA: or, wait, i think he fought without love 06:50 GG: Who? 06:50 GA: a guy named leon 06:50 GA: he's magic or something 06:50 GG: -s he going to be playing? 06:50 GA: hopefully 06:50 GG: - don't think - know him... 06:50 GG: - should talk to h-m at some point 06:50 GG: What's h-s handle? 06:50 GA: i was really excited to one day trick him into my moms lab 06:51 GA: and study him 06:51 GA: uh, i dont know 06:51 GG: ... 06:51 GG: Study h-m? 06:51 GA: well he's gotta have a source of power 06:51 GA: magic is fake as shit 06:51 GG: Ok 06:51 GG: so 06:51 GA: anyway, study in the friendliest way imaginable 06:51 GA: er 06:51 GA: wait 06:51 GA: that came out wrong 06:51 GG: you're s-tt-ng on another world 06:51 GA: yeah 06:51 GG: hav-ng just escaped from meteors 06:52 GA: mhm 06:52 GG: you have a ghostly spr-te float-ng next to you 06:52 GA: ghost alien creepy shit 06:52 GG: that has taken on the attr-butes of whatever you threw -nto -t 06:53 GA: it's a creepy xenomorph 06:53 GA: whats yours? 06:53 GG: Ugh 06:53 GG: - don't wanna talk about that guy 06:53 GA: what is he? 06:54 GG: Troll L-am neeson 06:54 GA: oh my god 06:54 GG: comb-ned with the outs-der from d-shonored 06:54 GA: you guys have li 06:54 GG: yes 06:54 GA: you guys have dishonored? 06:54 GG: yes 06:54 GG: - k-nda w-sh we never had 06:54 GA: iirc 06:54 GA: last convo was about how stupid all of this weird shit is 06:55 GA: its like 06:55 GA: circumstantially simeoultaneous or some shit 06:55 GG: hrm 06:55 GG: Can we please not talk about temporal log-st-cs? 06:55 GG: -t always makes my head hurt 06:55 GA: yeah that stuff is weird 06:55 GA: so whats your land like? 06:55 GG: So, what's your land l-ke? 06:56 GG: hehe woops 06:56 GA: haha 06:56 GA: oh my ghod 06:56 GA: d;f 06:56 GA: g 06:56 GA: we were just talking about that 06:56 GG: Oh my gog 06:56 GG: how about you go f-rst, okay? 06:56 GA: i think weve just confirmed the sentience of the universe 06:57 GA: okay 06:57 GG: And the universe has a s-ck sense of humor. 06:57 GA: my land is a beach with a foresty thing 06:57 GA: and uh 06:57 GG: go on 06:57 GA: hot ladies and foxes covered in oil 06:57 GG: ... 06:57 GG: that... 06:57 GG: -s very -nteresting 06:57 GG: um 06:57 GA: obviously a trap though 06:58 GG: yeah 06:58 GG: at least your traps are obv-ous 06:58 GA: its like a movie in which the character sees his dream but it's a trap 06:58 GA: also my dream was more sciency but idk 06:58 GG: - thought we weren't gonna talk about mov0es anymore! 06:58 GA: well it doesnt have to be a movie 06:59 GA: just any shitty medium which could have a plot 06:59 GG: yeah but 06:59 GG: trope transfer -s just as weird as all th-s other stuff 06:59 GA: whats your land like? 06:59 GG: well 07:00 GG: Ok, - can't bel-eve -'m asking this, but at th-s po-nt, why not... 07:00 GG: Do you guys have a v-deogame called Skyr-m? 07:00 GA: yes 07:00 GA: its p good 07:00 GA: but they dropped the better magic and armor systems from the previous games 07:01 GA: also no more unarmed :/ 07:01 GG: Jegus th-s -s gett-ng we-rd 07:01 GG: But anyways 07:01 GG: -t's k-nda l-ke that 07:01 GG: All these ru-ns and tundra and fjords and stuff 07:01 GG: But -t's... 07:01 GG: Barren. 07:01 GG: there are bones everywhere. 07:01 GA: yeah thats kinda how it is 07:02 GA: also; aliens have bones 07:02 GG: yes 07:02 GA: ill take note of that 07:02 GG: ... 07:02 GG: *narrows eyes* 07:03 GG: But yeah 07:03 GG: - k-nda havent gone farther than 50 feet from my house 07:03 GA: ive barely gone onto my yard 07:03 GG: yeah - wanna go out and explore 07:03 GG: but my computer -s -n here 07:04 GG: and - cant take that w-th me / ;c 07:04 GG: *s-gh* 07:04 GA: why cant you take it? 07:04 GG: -t's a desktop! 07:04 GA: dont you have phones? 07:05 GG: - dont 07:05 GG: Because -'m only away from my computer to hunt! 07:05 GA: advanced aliens 07:06 GA: spacefaring 07:06 GG: - have very few fr-ends, so constant contact has never really been -mportant to me 07:06 GA: no phones in constant use? 07:06 GA: i check my email like every few minutes 07:06 GG: Well, not for me 07:06 GG: -'ve never really had much of a l-fe outside of my comp and my hunt-ng 07:07 GA: why not? 07:07 GG: First of all, I l-ve 07:07 GG: l-ved 07:07 GG: -n the m-ddle of nowhere 07:07 GG: also, 07:07 GG: well, th-s -s k-nda embarass-ng, and - really shouldn't tell you, but... 07:07 GA: i probably wont even understand 07:07 GG: but -'m a male jadeblood 07:08 GA: aaand i dont understand 07:08 GG: The only one -n ex-stence 07:08 GA: why 07:08 GG: Jade bloods are almost -nvar-ably female 07:08 GA: wait you have green blood? 07:08 GG: yes 07:08 GA: omfg lucky 07:08 GG: why do you th-nk my text -s green? 07:08 GA: uh 07:08 GA: because you like green? 07:08 GA: thats why mines green 07:08 GG: oh, r-ght, humans... 07:09 GG: ok, look 07:09 GG: story t-me aga-n. 07:09 GA: okay 07:09 GG: so no -nterrupt-ng 07:09 GA: k 07:09 GG: Our society -s organ-zed by blood color 07:09 GG: - know humans only have bright red, but we have the a whole range. The hemospectrum. 07:11 GG: -n order, -t goes; burgundy, bronze, yellow, ol-ve, jade, teal, cerulean, -nd-go, purple, v-olet, and at the top -s fusch-a 07:12 GG: (only seadwellers have v-olet and fusch-a blood) 07:13 GG: The main thing the hemospectrum affects is l-fespan 07:13 GG: The h-gher up you are, the longer you l-ve 07:15 GG: for example, a burgundyblood may l-ve 50 sweeps -f they're lucky, whereas Her -mper-ous Condescens-on (our fusch-ablooded ruler) has l-ved for hundreds of sweeps and w-ll prob keep on go-ng for hundreds more 07:16 GG: - am a jadeblood 07:19 GG: Also, to answer your earl-er question, - type -n th-s color because -t -s my blood color. 07:19 GG: That -s called hemotyp-ng. 07:21 GG: Ok, a few th-ngs about jadebloods- 07:21 GG: Jadebloods are a fa-rly rare caste. 07:22 GG: We are normally tasked w-th car-ng for grubs, wh-ch -s why all jadebloods are female. 07:23 GG: Jadebloods are, for reasons - don't qu-te understand, res-stant to the burn-ng rays of the altern-an sun. 07:24 GG: And there's one other -mportant thing, but -t's rather embarras-ng... 07:24 GG: When Jadebloods are k-lled, they qu-te often become ra-nbow dr-nkers. 07:25 GG: Ra-nbow dr-nkers, well, they dr-nk blood. 07:26 GG: -t's the only th-ng that can keep them al-ve. 07:26 GG: And they k-nda glow -n the dark. 07:17 GG: The jade bloods are, as - said, almost -nvar-ably female 07:17 GG: - believe - am the only male jadeblood who has ever existed. 07:18 GG: And -t may just get me culled. 07:30 GA: wow okay 07:30 GA: culled means killed, right? 07:30 GG: Yup 07:30 GG: any -mperfections that may threaten the gene pool are removed 07:31 GG: And the smallest th-ng can be construed as an -mperfect-on. 07:31 GA: sounds horrible 07:31 GG: yeah 07:31 GA: too bad your entire planet will asplode from meteors 07:31 GG: Yeah... 07:31 GG: - kinda m-ss my lusus 07:32 GG: hey wa-t 07:32 GA: oh no, what happened to your lusus? 07:32 GG: D-d anyth-ng happen to your human-lusus? 07:32 GG: because m-ne was 07:32 GG: well, he was mudered 07:32 GA: by who? 07:32 GG: - don't know 07:32 GG: An adult 07:32 GA: oh no 07:32 GA: my lusus is fine 07:33 GG: I saw h-m murder my lusus, then he had -t dragged up to a battle cru-ser 07:33 GA: wow 07:33 GG: Then -t started to pull h-m up 07:33 GA: wait i have a question about the killer 07:33 GG: what? 07:33 GA: hold on lemme get it 07:34 GA: does he look kinda like elton john 07:34 GG: ...no 07:34 GA: oh okay 07:35 GG: - d-dnt see h-s face, but -'ll assume -t wasnt troll elton john 07:35 GA: because if he did, he'd probably be jack 07:35 GG: Who -s Jack? 07:35 GG: And where do - find him? 07:35 GA: and i was wondering if jack is evil, or just kinda sorta evil 07:35 GA: he's idk a guy 07:35 GG: ok 07:35 GG: Can - f-n-sh my story? 07:35 GA: he said i was cool so i dont want to kill him but my friends want me to 07:36 GA: sure thing 07:36 GG: Ok, so - saw th-s guy be-n hauled up to h-s battlecru-ser and leapt to catch h-m. 07:36 GG: He shot my sword outta my hand, and then he put a meathook through my eye. 07:36 GA: ouch 07:37 GG: yeah 07:37 GG: That was just before - entered, too 07:37 GG: -'m going to assume those two events are connected. 07:37 GA: are you okay? 07:37 GG: Yeah, -t's just an eye. 07:37 GG: - have two 07:37 GA: wow 07:38 GA: i think thats the most badass thing anyone has ever said to me 07:38 GG: And bes-des, now - have my scarf wrapped around my head and k-nda look l-ke kakash-! 07:38 GG: He's a character from a troll an-me 07:38 GG: He's cool 07:38 GA: you have troll naruto? 07:38 GG: yes. 07:38 GA: i never watched naruto :/ 07:38 GG: oh jegus 07:39 GG: this whole culture thing -s so we-rd 07:39 GA: yeah 07:39 GA: i wonder if the plots are the same? 07:39 GG: - dunno 07:39 GA: okay um, do you have troll attack on titan? 07:39 GG: Ooooohmygod yes 07:39 GG: -t's so good 07:40 GA: yeah okay so have you watched the first 25 episodes? 07:40 GG: not yet 07:40 GG: -'m on the 7th - th-nk 07:40 GA: what happened last? 07:40 GG: got a lot of shows -n the f-re r-ght now 07:41 GA: but we gotta analyze it and find out the differences 07:41 GA: actually thats a retarded idea, we can do that later 07:41 GA: assuming we both survive 07:41 GG: but the last thing - remember happening -s Erehnn Jaeger turning into a t-tan for the big plan and then attacking M-kasa 07:42 GA: wait what? 07:42 GA: thats exactly the same! 07:42 GA: except the name 07:42 GG: oh jegus 07:42 GA: it's eren jaeger for us 07:42 GG: troll names are always s-x letters per name 07:42 GA: human names can be whatever letters 07:42 GA: but 4 letter names are the most common 07:42 GG: huh 07:43 GG: that's weird 07:43 GG: but anyways... Do you guys have fullmetal alchemist? 07:43 GA: yeah 07:43 GA: never seen it though 07:43 GG: hrm 07:43 GA: i want to but im always doing things more important 07:44 GA: like strifing or sciencing or watching tv shows still going on today 07:44 GG: yeah, -'ve never really known that feel-ng unt-l just recently 07:44 GG: th-s game has given me much less free t-me 07:44 GA: not just the game, though 07:44 GA: just life in general is very time consuming 07:45 GG: -t never was for me 07:45 GG: - just had my computer and my hunting 07:45 GG: that and sleep-ng were my day 07:45 GA: sounds pretty awesome 07:45 GG: - guess 07:45 GA: dont you get bored? 07:45 GG: at times 07:45 GG: that's when - uh 07:46 GG: practice in my training room 07:46 GG: yknow 07:46 GA: oh my god 07:46 GG: practice my sweet moves 07:46 GG: like with a sword 07:46 GA: :I 07:46 GA: ill make another note in my notebook 07:46 GA: 'trolls... have... swords... tooooo...' 07:46 GG: yeah, -t's a little weird... 07:47 GG: also, ohmygodd-d-reallyjusttellyouthatjegus 07:47 GA: hmm 07:47 GG: congratulat-ons, you are now one of three people who know about my tra-n-ng room 07:47 GG: feel free to laugh 07:48 GA: are we talking about the same thing here 07:48 GA: you are talking about metal swishy blades, right? 07:48 GG: yes 07:48 GA: what 07:48 GG: that - use to attack pract-ce dumm-es 07:48 GG: and jump around like an -d-ot 07:48 GG: try-n to look cool 07:49 GG: oh gog, th-s -s embarras-ng 07:49 GA: wait youre talking about this right 07:49 GA: http://tinyurl.com/lklkqox 07:49 GA: because i think something may be getting garbled in translation here 07:49 GG: yes as far as - know that -s a sword 07:49 GA: new note 07:50 GG: what got garbled 07:50 GA: 'trolls... do not... have *those* kinds... of swords...' 07:50 GG: um 07:50 GG: well 07:50 GG: actually nvm 07:50 GA: 'they only have the fighty slicy ones' 07:50 GG: um 07:50 GG: yes, let's go with that 07:50 GA: wait 07:50 GA: okay now im confused 07:50 GA: do trolls have dicks or not? 07:51 GG: MOV-NG ON 07:51 GA: scratch those two notes 07:51 GA: scratch them like a record player 07:51 GA: all two of them 07:51 GG: yes let's do that please 07:51 GG: anyways 07:51 GA: two dj sessions 07:51 GA: getting scratched into new melodies 07:52 GA: like the old ones but with similarities 07:52 GA: do do dodododo 07:52 GG: say, do humans have the movie "-n wh-ch s-x extraord-nary -nd-v-duals, all of wh-ch were -ntroduced -n separate f-lms, thwart an al-en warlord's plans for -nvas-on and learn the value of teamwork and th-s troll d-sease called "fr-endsh-p": 5 f-ght scenes, a mass-ve battle against descend-ng al-en forces, and develop-ng flushed and pale relat-onsh-ps between major characters are conta-ned w-th-n."? 07:53 GA: uh 07:53 GA: sounds like avengers 07:53 GA: putting a 20 on avengers 07:53 GG: That what they call themselves -n the mov-e, so - guess so 07:53 GG: wait so for you the t-tle -s just "avengers" 07:54 GA: 'the avengers' 07:54 GG: wow 07:54 GG: that -s so... 07:54 GG: un-nformat-ve 07:54 GA: with tony stark, the hulk, captain america, and whoever else idk 07:54 GA: thor too 07:54 GA: catwoman? and archerybatman? 07:54 GG: scarlet w-dow and hawkeye, you mean? 07:55 GA: yeah 07:55 GG: they're my favor-te 07:55 GA: i dont really read the comics 07:55 GA: theyre cool, yeah 07:55 GG: because they k-ck ass without needing powers or anyth-n l-ke that 07:56 GG: the th-ng about the t-tle -s, throlls k-nda have thousands of sweeps of f-lm h-story, so we k-nda ran out of names 07:56 GA: lol 07:56 GA: if you have thousands of years of history how have desktop computers not been compacted? 07:56 GG: that 07:56 GG: -s an excellent quest-on 07:56 GG: luck-ly 07:56 GG: - have an excellent answer 07:57 GG: because even though -t's the same s-ze as your's my computer -s way better because everyth-ngs so compacted 07:58 GA: :/ 07:58 GG: so yeah 07:58 GG: - actually dont have an explanat-on for that 07:59 GA: does anybody know why anything happens 07:59 GA: even remotely 07:59 GG: - sure don't! 07:59 GG: - just wanna help people. 07:59 GA: good intentions dont get you anywhere 07:59 GG: But - guess now theres not really many more people to help anymore 07:59 GA: i think someone on my team may die because of me 08:00 GG: what 08:00 GG: what happened? 08:00 GA: jack, the guy, he asked me who i thought would die first 08:00 GG: Oh no. 08:00 GA: so i said the guy who let jack in to the game as a joke 08:00 GG: You th-nk he may act on your pred-ct-on? 08:00 GA: and jack said now he's going to die first 08:01 GG: oh my 08:01 GG: that -s not good 08:01 GG: - wish - could do someth-ng 08:01 GA: if he blames me, can i use 'well you let him into our session' 08:01 GA: or would he be pissed 08:01 GA: i barely know the guy, which makes this worse 08:02 GG: ugh, - HATE not be-ng able to help people! 08:02 GG: - really w-sh -t was poss-ble to save everyone... 08:02 GA: time travel saves everyone 08:02 GA: the ultimate deus ex machina is some douche with a time machine 08:03 GG: - don't th-nk -t does! 08:03 GG: you know that try-ng to change the past would result -n a paradox, r-ght? 08:03 GA: pff 08:04 GA: ive made graphs for this shit because its hard to mentally internalize 08:04 GG: ugh my head already hurts... 08:04 GA: ill have you know, stable loops are a thing which probably don't cause paradoxes 08:04 GA: and doctor who ignores all rules 08:04 GG: ... 08:04 GG: you guys have doctor who? 08:05 GA: yeah 08:05 GA: havent we established that we have like all of the same shows 08:05 GG: th-s -s honestly beg-nn-ng to d-stress me 08:05 GA: we'd better find out the reason for this or im going to flip 08:05 GG: -'m m-ght just fly off the handle. 08:06 GA: do an acrobatic fucking pirroutte right away from it 08:06 GA: go to the doorknob instead 08:06 GG: gonna w-n a medal for that sh-t 08:07 GG: ok, th-s has been fun, but - really need some sleep. - haven't slept s-nce - got here. 08:07 GA: me neither 08:07 GA: cya, jossik 08:08 GG: Goodbye, do-r 08:08 -- garrisonedGuardian GG gave up trolling galactoidArrival GA at 20:08 --